“At the crack of the bat, he was off…” Even if you’ve never watched a single baseball game the phrase “crack of the bat” is evocative enough that you can probably imagine the sound and be relatively close to what everyone else hears. Which is odd because if you’ve ever been to a baseball game you know that it’s a unique sound — the bat, the type of pitch, and where the batter hits the ball on the bat all make a difference to the tone and depth of crack that rings when the bat strikes the ball.
In football, I love the “thump of the ball” that sound when a player really drives through the ball and unleashes a venomous shot. And there again there are different sounds: a keeper’s kick sounds more hollow than a low, driven shot, from 40 yards.
I watch a lot of football and admittedly almost entirely on television. In a sense, I’m spoiled rotten. Most people in England have a hard time seeing any 3pm Saturday kickoff unless they attend the matches in person. Meanwhile, I see every important play from every conceivable angle, multiple times, and with at least two people commenting reflexively on whether the call was right, the shot was good, and which of the guys on the pitch was a hero or the devil.
In America, all televised games are “produced” in this way: there must be commentary at all times, there must be instant replay, there must be some guy yelling “boom” as he scribbles yellow lines on the screen. As sports fans we want to believe that the product is the game but ever increasingly the product is less the actual game and more the commentary on the game and the manner in which the game is presented to us.
The Superbowl is the best example of this event as product model. I’ve watched every Superbowl since about age 7. I remember Tom Landry, Roger Staubach, and Tony Dorsett in Superbowl XII and while they were the ones who were up front and got a lot of the praise, it was actually the Dallas defense that won that game — a lesson I would hold onto my entire life.
But I can’t for the life of me remember the half-time show or any of the commercials from Superbowl XII. In fact, I didn’t start noticing the importance of the commercials in the Superbowl until the media hype around the commercials in the Superbowl told me that the commercials in the Superbowl were something I should watch out for. I think the first memory of Superbowl commercials was watching the game with a guy named John and his group of friends. My memories of that day are that we had habenero chili cheese dip and he told me to shut up when the commercials came on. Naturally, the only thing I remember from that game is the Budweiser commercial with the frogs who say “bud”… “bud”… “bud”… “weis”…”ER”.
I can’t tell you the winners of the last 10 Superbowls, but I bet you I can recall at least 5 memorable commercials that were launched during those games — or a nipple-slip, or the fact that the Rolling Stones are sucking the life out of music.
Producing commercials for the Superbowl are so important that I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Budweiser has a team dedicated to Superbowl commercials who work 365 days a year, just on that spot. That’s all they do. As soon as the last one is out of the chute, they are hard at work analyzing ratings and determining if their commercial hit the spots they wanted to hit or not. For them, the game is a commercial delivery system and nothing else.
There was a moment yesterday while I has preparing my By the Numbers column for Arseblog News that I had the Juventus-Cesena match on in the background. There I was, digging into data about Arsenal’s season when suddenly I could hear the thump of the ball, the sound of the crowd, and players yelling at each other in Italian. All the commentary had fallen away and all that was left was the game: no replays, no guy telling me what to think of di Natale, and no one telling me who the ball was being played from and to. Just the thump of the ball, the players straining against one another, and the sound of the crowd surging with the game.
Fox couldn’t let this somewhat unadulterated experience of the game continue and immediately broke in with one of their studio pundits who started describing what we were already seeing. But it was too late.
The moment of clarity had slipped between the cracks of our hypercritical world and showed me how much I missed those simple sounds. In that moment I remembered how much of our experience of these games is mediated by the commentators, camera men, instant-replay, and presentation of the “facts” during and after the game. And yes, I include this blog in that criticism.
But the reality is that I just miss the thump of the ball.
—Sorry for the technical difficulties, we now return you to your regularly scheduled blogram–
In this same vein, I was watching the resurrection of Tiger and the ‘color’ commentator said the sound of Tiger’s club striking the ball during his practice round when compared to Zach Johnson’s would bode well for Tiger on Sunday. He turned out to be right but I thought he should keep his ‘tongue and tail’ wagging more neutral.
I watch the games these days with the sound muted. Not only don’t/can’t the commentators shut up, but their bias is almost always against Arsenal. I started watching back in 2001, and even remember asking my English/Italian wife why the commentators said so little…now they follow the American announcing pattern and never stop talking.
@scruzgooner, me too! But wish stations gave us the option of muting the commentary and leaving the sounds of the crowd & the game. What I find often is that I get a better quality stream from stations that are not English so I don’t know what the commentators / pundits are saying so that helps my enjoyment factor as well because some of the commentators on the Arabic stations sound as if they are going mental – especially of one of the players are Muslim and happens to score.
@GoonerTerry, * especially if
@GoonerTerry, I agree, Arabic commentary is the funniest. Spanish is also pretty awesome if only for the occasional “Goooooooooooooooooooooooooolllllllll!!!!!!”
@Eurazian, the funniest was when Na$ri scored “that” goal and the Arabic announcer was like: Allah, Allah, OH ALLLAAAHHHH. I took that to mean OMG, OMG, OOOMMMMGGGGGG!!! (0;
@scruzgooner, A plausible solution? Fans make so much noise that it becomes difficult to hear the commentators.
I was watching the home game against Dortmund and the commentary was drowned out for the most part. Credit to the visiting fans as well as the home fans. I enjoyed that match very much. Maybe y’all have hit on the reason why.
Is Tommy Smyth particularly Arsenal-hating, or is he annoying towards all clubs?
@Ssinderias, I’ve always felt that Tommy Smyth was never particularly Arsenal-hating (though after listening to an EPL Talk podcast interview with him a couple of years ago, I thought he sounded like a LeGrove commenter).
I’ve always felt that Tommy Smyth is an equal-opportunity complainer. Everyone is great as long as they’re doing it perfectly. If they miss by an inch, if the ball goes wide instead of the back of the auld onion bag, they’re shameful rubbish. I’ve heard him tut-tut pretty much every team I’ve heard him cover, and it’s always a bit hyperbolic – it’s just a missed shot, Tommy, not the end of the world!
I think all of us who were NOT on the Gary Cahill and Christopher Samba bandwagon should pat ourselves on the back and send Wenger a thank you card with a little something extra in this year.
I couldn’t agree more mate. Having seen this picture in the Metro this morning, I’m starting to think he’ll fit right in at Tottenham…
http://www.metro.co.uk/sport/football/883822-bolton-baffled-over-gary-cahill-red-card-against-spurs
(Apologies for the link)
@ctpa, you are right…I was so irate at the time of all the hype that I nearly blew a gasket…no matter how many time Le Boss proves them wrong there are still some people who feel they know more that him…In Jamaica we say “Mout mek fe talk” in other words: “Talk is cheap”..
@ctpa, Cahill obviously hasn’t worked out how to “do a Nasri” and play well in order to command big bids and a massive contract.
I was solidly on the Chris Samba bandwagon last season and haven’t quite got off it yet. Price aside, has he done anything to suggest he wouldn’t have been a better buy than Mertesacker?
LOL at the picture in GloriArse’s link.
@Eurazian, A few viewers ticked you down…. but I ticked you up again because you evidently like Samba and your opinion matters, that’s what make this blog great.
BUT….. Here comes my outrageous sweeping statement: Per Mertesacker is a better defender to Samba on many levels. In my opinion Samba has reached his plateau playing for Blackburn… Per Mertesacker has only started his journey playing for Arsenal and he will be a great defender in years to come.
Last year on this blog and several others…. there was so much criticism for Koscielny (I know who you are) but this second season finds him getting better and better). Per Mertesacker is a very intelligent man…. he knows what he has to do to improve his game…. and through the grapevine… I hear he always makes himself available to play.
Furthermore… Samba although a good defender will never be a great defender…. because if he was… ManCity or Man U and Chelsea would have purchased him. But give him credit he does what he does well, however he is not a GREAT FOOTBALLER…. compare him to TV5 or even Taylor of NEWCASTLE – who seems to me like a one man brigade who have kept his team in the top tier of the BPL.
More sweeping statements: Cahill could have been a contender, and yes he’s had an awful year so far…. but I still see talent in him…alas his advisers made the wrong decisions for him last year. Sometimes in life…. to be the best you can be… you need to take the next step…to go to a place with superb and excellent coaches and management who can but only improve you and your game.
Cahill was not as brave as Arteta who demanded a transfer and left. Cahill was not able to see the bigger picture— but Spurs will get him for free next year … and yes I like Cahill and not because he is British; for I also like Jose Luiz of Chelsea; I see great potential in him
@London Calling, nice to have intelligent discussion!
Obviously this is all hypothetical because Samba clearly isn’t coming to us. I don’t think Samba is necessarily a GREAT defender, but I wanted Wenger to sign him because he’d have ticked several boxes we often lacked last year – leadership, size, good at corners, and he seems to be decisive rather than likely to over-elaborate which can often be costly for us.
I like Mertesacker because he plays for Arsenal and he seems like a decent and intelligent chap. But what I was worried about when we signed him, and which he hasn’t yet dispelled, is obviously pace, but especially the question of whether he can adapt to the Prem. A lot of players who are proven elsewhere just can’t adjust to the English game (Squillaci the obvious example). That’s a problem Samba doesn’t have.
Your point about criticism of Koscielny last year brings me to the other thing I worry about with Per. Kos’s mistakes were understandable because he was relatively inexperienced and on the way up. Per by contrast has been playing at one of the highest levels for a while for Germany, but seems to have been overtaken in the last couple of years by the likes of Hummels. So there is a question of whether he has reached a plateau in his career as well.
Anyway, I really hope Per will prove my doubts unfounded and go on to be a legend for us. The potential is there, but at the moment I think it could still go either way.
like scruzgooner i too watch the games without the sound. and like you, tim, i miss the sounds of the game, but it is a sacrifice i have come to grips with. i no longer have my own view of the game tainted by the driveling banalities of a commentary team telling me what to pay attention to and what to think and taking my focus away from where it would otherwise be. i find now that i have dramatically different views on the games and players than my friends who watch the game with commentary, and are people who generally don’t have an opinion that they did not read or hear elsewhere. i recommend to everyone to at least try it. i like putting on a bit of music in the background, do make say think being my preference as once when the crescendo of one of their songs came right as arshavin scored and it just coincided beautifully. obviously that was a while ago. but seriously, you are all just as smart as any commentary team, all just as able to make you own opinions. if we all came to our own conclusions before coming together in places like this to discuss perhaps the level of debate would be higher, or at least a better representation of your views rather than rehashings of others. good article tim, if only there were a way to mute commentary but keep crowd and field noises.
also a way to direct your own camera angles would be pretty awesome. i watched an old world cup game and their main camera angle was of the whole field, and i think that is ideal for understanding how a team is playing and seeing the movement all over the pitch, even when the ball is not near. but, we are a culture obsessed with personalities, and thus we focus on persons, not the single organism that is a well trained team.
I agree there should be more whole field shots. I’ve been trying to school myself in tactics. So I like to watch the movement off the ball. Too bad I only get glimpses of it in the broadcasts.
Here’s an interesting difference between Serie A and the Premier League. Last week AC Milan were hammering Genoa 4-0 and Max Patrick, the announcer said that there was a gentleman’s agreement to not run scores up in Serie A above 5.
Arsenal playing keep away and thus not attempting to run up the score on Wigan were according to the announcer, “taking the mickey” and deserving to be kicked.
@ctpa, Is that Serie A thing really true? It seems kind of baffling, but on the other hand I can’t remember any team scoring 5 0.o
@feygooner, I remember this being discussed on Football Weekly once and it being custom there. Of course, it is also customary in Italy for them to agree a score beforehand of it benefits both teams. A whole lot of draws in the latter part of the season.
@gsco, Allegedly……
@ctpa, I am sure vthat such an agreement would be deemed illegal by the authorities …but then again in Italia anything is possible..
@ctpa, Aye. That annoyed me greatly. When was passing the ball “taking the mickey”? I must have missed that rule change.
for non intrusive commentary cricket takes some beating. the [quite] leisurely pace of the game contributes to some sublime and entertaining discussion.
@jax, So true. For me, it’s the best part of watching cricket. You end up hearing the driest of dry humour. So great.
@Bunburyist, true unless you are watching cricket in the West Indies then what grabs your attention is the wettest bikini-clad person (not always women I might add) drinking beer and not taking a blind bit of notice of the game (0;
@GoonerTerry, Sounds like I should be watching my cricket in the West Indies!
@Bunburyist, at Sabina Park in Jamaica they have a place called The Mound – I think its illegal to wear too much clothes there – but the patrons just go to drink Red Stripe and carouse and the last time I was in the stands overlooking the Mound, most of the patrons only looked towards the field when the rest of the crowd cheers…
@GoonerTerry, That sounds fantastic. I’ve never been to Jamaica (the extent of my Caribbean travels is Trinidad & Tobago, which I loved), but now I know where to go when I get my chance! I’m also a massive fan of jerk chicken.
I am constantly trying to find a volume where I can easily tune out the drivel coming from the announcer, but still hear the crowd. I hate how the crowd noise is muffled so it is difficult to hear the chants. I also hate the zoom used too frequently. I wish they’d give me more of the field so you can see what is going on. And sometimes I just get pissed when they zoom in and stay there.
Someone needs to invent something to mute the announcers only. A gag seems straight forward solution to me but I gather the TV companies like them and won’t do that.
This article reminds me of this hilarious, if it wasn’t do true and happening, video around the time of the world cup- how to get Americans to watch soccer from Slate:
@gsco, hilarious and frightening at the same time (0;
@gsco, dear god that would be soooooooo irritating.
@gsco, brilliant, thanks for posting that. So true.
Tim, did you see the one-shot, commentator-free “Silent Game” that NBC did in 1980, between the Jets and Dolphins?
I thought it was great – you got replays (unless I misremember), you could hear the Public Address announcer telling you what they tell the crowd, you could hear the crowd – but they never, ever did it again. I’d love to have that for a football match, like an ESPN game free of Ian Darke.
I turn down the sound, just enough that I can’t make out what they’re saying, still hear the game even if it is quiet.
I wish there was a happy medium between the US style and the English style… I can’t stand the american guys that will say stuff like “release the kraken” but it annoys me how the english commentators can turn an intense game into a dry analysis session. All the build up to a great game, and then you here these 2 guys sit back and comment like they were watching tulips grow.
I actually really like “fanzone” sometimes, that at least makes you feel like you’re involved in the atmosphere of the game!
I am with you. I would have loved to hear the sound of John Terry’s fat arse falling on the pitch allowing Van Persie to score.
is there any way that these guys can be the announcers for Arsenal’s matches??? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZTiRdcURuI
A great result on Saturday, I go away for the day and we score four goals… nice one and regarding my day in Paris … it was lovely and the food was très magnifique
Tim: I hear you regarding the necessity for commenters during a football game; we miss the sound of the ball, the yak of the players during the game and the hum of the supporters in the stadium.
It is a well established protocol in my home (if England and Arsenal) are playing and it’s being shown on ITV, we mute the sound and listens to commentary from BBC Radio Five Live. However if Lawrenson is co presenting the match on the BBC Radio or BBC TV I watch the game on a small screen in another room without sound.
There are many football commentators who annoy me both in Europe and USA, especially (ESPN Steve McManaman) but I confess to liking the sound of two male voices from the BBC. One is Alan Green; who some of you may be aware of and Conor McNamara who to my ears has the most wonderful clear Irish brogue. http://youtu.be/4rsQI_ZpzsY. He is his rarely disparaging and his voice has authority and I personally love listening to him.
P.S. The sound of leather to willow is one of the most wonderful sport sounds (It must be cricket). I was raised with that sound and it still makes me feel good… British summertime and Cricket. Nice
who was it who called v. Persie’s wondergoal against Charlton? I enjoyed that.
i would love to not be bothered by the stupid onesided comentaters that hafe the time have false info but i still leave it on because i like hearing the faint sounds of the game and also my fellow fans.
ps
we have that fool webb as a ref against everton…damn
As much as I hate most of the commentary, it has to be said that when you are 4 nil up, the comedy value can be priceless. I forget which idiot it was doing the commentary on Fox for the Wigan game but he was getting hysterical about the lack of support for Sammon up front. Listening to him moan, you would think that his wife had run off to Caligula. At one point I thought he was going to say “Oh fuck this” and get on the pitch himself.
@nycgunner, that conversation lasted the full 90 plus HT it was literally the only thing they talked about. that cometater was quit agitated and offended by it. it was pretty funny
@nycgunner, yeah I was listening to that, I think it was Gary Birtles.
He also pronounced Yossi as “Yoss-eye” which I found odd.
liverpool just lost to fulham thanks to the american clint dempsey!
@jacob, e score when he wants, he scores when he wants Clint Eastwood oh oh…
Just before the start of the Prem campaign this past August, there was a great deal of hype about Liverpool, Chelsea, and Stoke (with at least one journalist comparing Pulis’ magic hand in the transfer window to Wenger’s massive incompetence). Nobody is surprised that City and United are up there. Some are surprised by Tottenham. But how refreshing to see Liverpool and Stoke sitting below us, and Chelsea looking vulnerable.
We’re in the Europa standing now, but I can see Tottenham–the current media darling–falling behind as the term wears on. Fourth looks a distinct possibility for us now, provided key players stay fit. Most people had us finishing 6th or 7th this season (at times I have to admit I considered this more likely than a top four finish).
There’s a lot of season left, but I look at the squad this year, and I just see more fighters in it than we’ve had in previous seasons. We lost the silky and mesmerizing Fabregas, then the impish Nasri, and while we haven’t replaced their creativity, we did bring in experience and toughness in mind and body. Arteta and Song in particular I think can help haul us into the top four. To come back from those early season defeats and respond the way we did? I don’t think last year’s squad could have, though admittedly, that’s also because we really didn’t have RVP and Vermaelen.
@Bunburyist, Agree 100%.
I actually really like the current state of the squad (back-up striker aside). And unlike the past few seasons, I feel we will win every game we go into.
@Bunburyist, One of the odd side-effects of having produced the Invincibles is that we now know that we actually can go the rest of the season without losing a match. Fuck Fourth, I’m gunning for the top.
Fantastic piece. Thanks, Tim.
- Couple of goals each half – Check
- Clean Sheet – Check
- No Own Goals – Check
- >55% possession – Check
- No last minute panic – Check
- No Wneger throwing the bottle – Check
- No crazy red cards, biased refreeing – Check
- Goals from Striker, Winger, Midfielder, Defender – Check
- Goal from set piece – Check
- Goal from outside the box piledriver – Check
- Goal from a keeper rebound tapped in – Check
- Goal from a run down the side and cut back-in – Check
- Goal from RVP – Check
- Goal from RVP’ – Check
- Goals and assists from Captain – Check
- Goals and assists from ViceCaptain – Check
- No major injuries – Check
- Opposition hoodoo erased – Check
- Gone up in league table – Check
- Chamakh goal…Che..Damn it..!!! What a horrible weekend
I live in Jerusalem, had a choice of Israeli or Egyptian TV. Went with Israeli. Mostly it’s the English commentary from the UK, but whenever there’s an incident, the Israeli commentators come in and talk over the top.
It’s kind of annoying at first but after a while you notice that when the English fades back in, someone’s always in the middle of saying something completely witless or wrong. Say you just saw Cattermole take the ball after taking the man and then hear some idiot saying it was no foul. Or you just watched Theo beat his defender and sling in a good cross that no-one tried to get on the end of, and then hear someone finishing a sentence about his lack of football brain. Or you just saw Man Utd scrape a poor win from a deflected goal, celebrate like heroes and then hear them praised to the heavens. And then you pray for the Hebrew again to drown those fuckers out.