His head bowed down,
His hands spun round,
He cracked a stoic grimace.
Arteta limped off
At Newcastle.
Back tomorrow with a full post.

It started like any other day, champagne and crackers.

Some discussion about the phenomenology of the back four…

and how to win at Blackjack (I have read this book).

All together now!
After this, things get weird! They go out and suffice it to say there are a lot of pictures of alcohol being consumed. Like this:

And this:

And before you know it, it ends up like this:

But hey, it’s not a good night unless someone ends up in a Kevin Keegan wig, Harry Potter glasses, and a pair of pumps.

Time for sleep before the big match the next day

Some time between here and kickoff one of our fearless crew gets his bag stolen. Inside the bag are everyone’s tickets to the match. Despite being pilfered, they all got in: most because Ricky remembered the membership numbers, some because they bought a second ticket, and one because he may or may not have snuck in. Through the club level.
But they all got in. A testament to the perseverance of the modern Gooner!
They did sit all the way up in the nosebleeds.

But the view is actually not too bad.

Even on the other end of the pitch, you can still see what a useless referee Howard Web is!

If you look close you can actually see the ball coming off the wall, which is a whole 6 yards away!

There’s also a great view of the dugouts.

And the technical area. Wenger and Pardew don’t get along muchly.

In the end, Arsenal get the win and the joy expressed by some players is very real:

For others, maybe not so much.

Giroud’s now famous piggy-back of Szczesny.

Did any of you catch Sagna spraying people with his lucozade? Weird.

I saw it live and it felt strange, so too did the line walk up thing. I mean, I get the relief, we all felt the relief, so maybe they are all just fans, like us?

Newcastle got some from their players as well.

But it was the Arsenal who were in full voice after the final whistle.

Everyone was happy

So much love:

Sorry Bale, I know you trademarked that, but I have a feeling that’s going to come back to bite you.

Home safe and look, everyone’s flaunting trademarks!
You may know him from http://invinciblog.com or from twitter @invinciblog but he’s a funny dude and I asked him if he would make me some alternate trophies for 1st-5th place in this year’s Premier League. And naturally he obliged!

Tottenham’s Andres Villas-Boas gets this gem for his “downward spiral” jibe after Spurs got lucky and beat Arsenal 2-1. 5th place and a half-hearted handy! Enjoy Euroa League football without Gareth Bale next year, chump.

For finding his balls and dropping Szczesny and Vermaelen after that loss to Spurs and thus inspiring the Arsenal defense to one of the best finishes I have ever seen in the Wenger era, here’s 4th place’s “found your balls” trophy.

There’s nothing worse than Chelsea and their managerial revolting door, except their fans and their smug sense of satisfaction at buying some “history” over the last 8 years. I hope they get Mourinho back and he starts fighting with the owner on the very first day. It’s what they deserve, that and this trophy.

It was a close call between Mancini and Benitez as to which would win the revolting manager award. But in the end, Samir Nasri’s slack-jawed 5 goals haul at the cost of over a £2m a goal put Man City one up on Chelsea and ensured that they won the Costly Cup.

And finally, to Man U and Sir Alex Ferguson, 1st place goes to you lot and may it be your last for many many years to come. I know we are all supposed to be teary-eyed because chicken-fried-steak-face retired and all his great “achievements” for England. But I’m going to save my hagiography until after he actually dies because until then, like herpes, we never can trust that he’ll be gone for good.