Now this is what I’m talking about! It took them a full week to get into the swing of things but as of today I can confidently say that the press have officially opened Arsenal’s transfer window.
Marvel at this article by Matt Hughes over at the Times, where the author suggests that Arsenal’s center forward problem could be solved by Emile Heskey. As much as I’d like to rip the article apart, I have to give Matt some props. At least he’s trying, and he’s not telling us a lie like “Arsene is going for Heskey” he’s just making a case for Heskey. Which is fine, even if it reminds me of one of those historical fiction novels, like Master and Commander.
Next up, we have some straight forward press reporting which has every magazine, newspaper, online journal, blog, and even town crier from here to Sunderland linking Arsenal to 6’8″ Ivorian Lacina Traore. It’s not really bad reporting because the player’s team is the one who are saying that Arsenal have asked about the kid. And so, of course, if you’re a 19 year old, playing for CFR Cluj and your club president makes an announcement to the press that Arsenal have asked about you, of course you are going to say that it would be a real honor and all that. And finally, of course the journo’s are going to report the whole thing. I mean, if I was in the press corpse I would do the same thing.*
What I might not do, however, is taint the poor kid by picking Arsenal fan’s Adebayor scab and call him “the new Adebayor.” He can’t possibly be the new Adebayor, unless he’s lazy, constantly wanders offside, compares himself to Thierry Henry, demands a huge wage increase, then f*cks off to Manciti, and makes a disgrace of himself and his new club by constantly taking sh*t about his former club’s supporters. Oh, and Robin? Watch your face in training.
Basically, what I’m saying is that this kid has years to disgrace himself before being labeled the New Adebayor.
And then, finally, we have a story that’s so laughably stupid it could only come out of Spain. I know I make fun of the British press, but they look like paragons of reporting when held up next to papers like Marca, who just make stuff up in the service of certain big Spanish clubs. Marca are reporting that Real Madrid are going to trade Arsenal Gonzalo Higuaín for Cesc Fabregas. I don’t have a problem with Higuaín, he’s a decent player, but Arsenal aren’t trading Cesc for anyone and Cesc is never going to play for Real Madrid, ever.
So, all of this got me thinking, the transfer window has been open a week and in that time we’ve been linked with 10 players; Traore, Hulk, Heskey, Higuaín, Cole, Beckford, Bellamy, Veloso, Huntelaaar, and Victor Moses. Which player is the most ridiculous? Have your say in your poll below!
*Oh hey, look, I AM DOING THE SAME THING!