swimming against the stream

What a difference a day can make.

I feel like the characters in “Invasion of the Body Snatchers:” I went to bed last night, having read an article in which Sir Alex Ferguson is quoted coming to Wenger’s defense, and awoke to a shiat stream of highly negative attack pieces. Fergie? Defending Wenger? Even though he sneaks in a back-handed complement, still, he’s showing some respect for Arsene and I don’t think we see that too often.

Of course it’s unfair [the negative press Wenger's received], it’s not easy buying players in January as I’ve said time and time again. There’s not a lot you can do then. They lost [Abou] Diaby for a while, Denilson, [Tomas] Rosicky, [Robin] Van Persie and, I’m telling you, you cannot win games consistently without your best team

Wow. Sure he goes on to tell everyone how he’s “got the squad” and thus gets in a little dig. And Fergie lets slip that he has a bit of a selfish motive to the statement by saying “You would tell me quicker than you tell Arsène” when asked how he thought the press would react if Man U went three years without a trophy. But make no mistake, Fergie outright defended Le Boss against the wolves in the press.

Common enemies or something, eh?

And then this morning. Ugh.

First, I’m sitting here with a hangover and I start the morning by reading Arseblog in which Arseblogger is “having a moan” about the moaners. Actually, it’s less a “moan” and more of an angry screed against some of his fellow bloggers and the press. Now, as far as the press is concerned, I hadn’t seen anything unusual last night so I opened up my RSS reader and did a quick search for Arsenal and…

Jesus.

The Guardian published a commentary which wheels out the old “Arsenal needs more Englishmen” warhorse.

The same site also published a commentary disguised as a news story which is just 500 words ripping Arsene a new arse.

Not to be outdone, the Telegraph LITERALLY prosecutes Wenger.

Wow.

I’ve seen some bizarre shiat in the press, but a prosecution? Using quotes? That’s just sick.

When Cesc made his comments last week about how the English seem to revel in Arsenal’s downfall I dismissed and sort of ridiculed him. Similarly, when Wenger was fuming about press treatment, I just let it slide with some kind of snide comment.

That’ll teach me. I honestly don’t know how these people can call themselves reporters. No wonder Fergie felt the need to defend Wenger. No wonder why Arseblogger was so mad.

As Wenger said yesterday Arsenal are “swimming against the stream.” If that’s true, today’s spate of articles have shown that it’s a stream of shiat.

One last thing: I’ve been meaning to change the format of my match day posts to a post match roundup instead of a pre-match blurb. This is simply a function of the fact that matches are often played before 7am local time and I usually have team news the day before. So, tomorrow you will get a post around 11am my time.

See you then.

Amazing Theo, how sweet the sound…

Theo Walcott blazing past some helpless defenders

Looks like Theo Walcott is set to be England’s newest wunderkind/press target.

After Saturday’s amazing run the press went on an amazing run of their own and printed a spate of gushing news stories which culminated in some juicy quotes from England manager Fabio Capello.

I was delighted with the impact that Theo Walcott made on the game – the run he made for Arsenal’s second goal was incredible. To go past so many players with such speed and balance is one thing, but to have the composure and awareness to pick a pass at the crucial moment showed great skill and maturity. There can be no disputing Walcott’s ability.

I agree. He will be great on Arsenal’s right wing next year and maybe in 2 years play up front. What? I know. I hate Eboue too but I just don’t see the manager making a change on Sunday. Here’s why:

  1. Eboue and Toure are a horrible attacking team on the right wing, but they are a great defensive squad. Who better to play on the right side in order to shut down Man U’s singularity of greatness?
  2. For all of Theo’s great offensive capabilities, he doesn’t defend very well. I know, a striker doesn’t do much defending but a wing player does.
  3. Eboue has shut down Ronaldo before, multiple times. Remember last year? That image of Ronaldo screaming at Eboue while he tried to act tough will be forever burned into my brain. Eboue gets under Ronaldo’s skin, harasses him, pisses him off, and has the pace and defensive acumen to keep up with Ronaldo. I hate the fucker but he has been very effective against Ronaldo.
  4. Wenger. Wenger isn’t the kind of guy who will change game plans and right now, the plan is to use Theo as an impact player. Steady, pig headed, whatever you call it, that’s our manager.

So, as amazing a run as that was on Saturday, and I honestly put it up there with the 1989 Anfield title capturing run, I think we should all expect to see Eboue on the wing on Sunday.

And I hope he gives them hell. What’s the worst that could happen? He gets a red card? That would be a blessing.

Speaking of red cards… there is ONE source stating that the FA is looking to increase bans to 6 matches, allow post match sanctions for players who escaped a red card, and clear players who have been wrongly carded. This is all well and fine and logical and smart and sensible if it’s true.

IF.

For those of you who are recent converts or who just want to bask in the glory that is Arsene Wenger’s record against Man U, here’s a great article that matches the two head to head in several different categories. I’m not exactly certain what “Top Trumps” are but I think it’s some kind of card game?  Like “Magic the Gathering” for sports nerds?

Finally, in team news, you no doubt know by now that Flamini will be out for 3 weeks due to the intentional raking of his Achilles by Gerrard.  The Rock of Gilberto will take his place.  I have to say that Gilberto is a great guy.  To lose both his starting spot and the captain’s armband in the same season and to be the professional he has been is pretty darned cool.

Oh yeah, Cesc and Ade are shortlisted for Ronaldo’s PFA award.

Until tomorrow.

madness

I got something in my eye

Kicking off the post meltdown madness, our old friend Jens Lehmann has decided to let it be known loud and clear that he’s a bitter old man. I swear the press wait for any slight slip in Arsenal’s form to seek comment from Lehmann and so the prospect of getting juicy new quotes following the defeat at Anfield must have been dizzyingly exciting. And boy did he deliver!

On Almunia:

To be sitting on the bench behind somebody who only started to play when he was 30 is not funny. I am very angry.  FIRE BAD!!  JENS ANGRY!

On Wenger:

If the coach had spoken to me before the start of the season then I would have been able to decide if I wanted to sit on the bench. PLAY JENS EVERY GAME OR JENS SQUISH SKINNY COACH! He has a different opinion and I don’t really believe he can be happy with it.

On Arsenal getting kicked out of the Champions League:

For me personally, it is a tragedy, HURRRGARBBLE JENS ANGRY MUST KILL! particularly since I did not have a chance to prevent it.

Yes Jens, it is a personal tragedy for you that Arsenal lost at Anfield. And yes, Jens, Almunia is not as funny as you. And yes, Jens, Wenger plotted your demise, it wasn’t the lapse in concentration in your first two games and the complete disorganization of the defense when you were in the sticks, instead it was a conspiracy. A vicious plot to keep the greatest keeper of all time repressed. I’m sure it has something to do with the fact that Wenger is French, and you know, the whole World Wars I and II thing…

In true tragic fashion it’s never the others who cause the downfall, it’s always the hero, and Jens has done more than his fair share to cause his own downfall. From member of the invincibles, to Champions League goat, to mouthy, petulant, baby; you brought it all on yourself Jens and yet your hubris won’t let you admit it.

As Shakespeare once said to King Lear, please just shut up.

Speaking of petulant, mouthy, whining former Arsenal players… current media darling David Bentley has admitted that he had a gambling problem. Now, as soon as I read that I literally prayed that he’s the player involved in the match throwing scandal. No word yet, but if there’s a god…

Another tidbit that comes out of the article is that he was deep into his addiction while at Arsenal and that gambling and not football was his passion:

I would wake up in the morning and the first thing I would think about would be to have a bet rather than play football. All I wanted was to have a bet.

And just last week he was urging Theo to leave Arsenal because “Wenger never gives youngsters a chance and moving was what saved mycareer.” You’re a lying little sack of shit aren’t you David? You had the talent to play at Arsenal and you blew it on gambling. Well, here’s to a short and terrible career.

And finally, of course the press are all in a frenzy with the “I told you so’s” about how shitty Arsenal was going to be this year. Yes, their dire predictions of a 5th-8th place finish for Arsenal have finally come true and a half season of hand wringing as Arsenal took the top of the league can finally and gladly come to an end. My favorite part though is how some of the papers have decided to help Arsenal out with some friendly advice about who they should have bought this summer and in January. Here’s a smattering of their suggestions:

Johnathan Woodgate: yeah, after his “impressive” stint at Boro (following 9 appearances in three years for Real Madrid) he would have been the perfect signing. I see Woody’s “resurgence” as a sign of just how appalling Tottenham’s defense is rather than how impressive he has been. Woodgate, the stalwart defender who let in 4 goals against Chelsea. He’s the perfect replacement for Senderos!

Jermaine Defoe: surely this is a joke. First Woody and now Defoe? Why not just transplant the entire Tottenham squad? Then Arsenal would be assured a spot in the middle of the table.

Lassana Diarra: Diarra was only in the squad 6 months before he started having a go at the manager. Can the kid play? Sure, but do you want someone on the team who stirs up trouble (other than Jens, because he’s so funny!)? It would be nice to have some cover for Flamini, but remember that Diarra wanted to start ahead of Flamini.  He pretty much refused to play cover for Flamini and let the whole world know about his dissatisfaction with the situation. Letting Diarra go was the right decision.

Ribery: fair suggestion, he has been tearing up the Bundesliga and a scoring right winger is needed: English players need not apply.

Igor Akineev: who? Oh some keeper. Meh. Almunia has been fine. Almunia didn’t lose Hyypia on a corner kick. Almunia didn’t tug down Babel. I rather like Almunia, but then, I know fuck all about keepers. So maybe this is a good suggestion and maybe it’s just shit stirring and grasping at straws. When in doubt, it’s usually the latter with the British press.

I don’t know why we haven’t seen the “Why didn’t Arsenal buy Torres and Babel and Drogba and Essien?” story yet. I guess we’ll have to give them time, after all the feeding frenzy has just begun.

Until tomorrow!