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Fabregate Should Be Decided Soon

As I’ve said before, I’d be shocked if Fabregas doesn’t get a ban for his part in Phil Brown’s spittergate. After all, Cesc is a member of Al Queda and we can give those fellers no quarter or they will be spitting on our children’s corpses: IT WAS THAT BAD.

There’s also very little news: Adebayor is going to Chelsea (OH GOD PLEASE YES), ManU is ready to win the title IN OUR FACES, Xabi Alonso is the first of a long summer of “not signing for Arsenal” stories, some Argentinian kid is in North London for a trial at Arsenal — and funny enough, he thought he was getting a trial at Arsenal di Sarandi! And finally, there’s a board room showdown brewing! Arsenal’s largest, I mean biggest, I mean fattest shareholder is going to challenge the board to a debt off. He’s worried that the £17m we pay in interest (despite the fact that we have £30m+ in annual cash profits AFTER paying debt, taxes, and salaries, etc AND that we have over £100m in cash reserves) anyway, Usemanoff is worried that the £17m in interest we pay on our £300m debt is holding us back from being more like his favorite club; Manchester United. And so he wants to try to force the board into a one time debt pay down thingy/marketing ploy to make himself look like he’s trying to improve the squad.

I think that the more owners get involved in the management of the team, the worse the team gets. So, he should sit down, shut the fuck up, and let Arsene Wenger build his team.

Anyway, while we’re waiting for the FA to hand out a 100 match ban for Cesc Fabregas raping Phil Brown’s children with spit, I’d like to give you a sepcial treat; Phil Brown’s season in photographs.

They won the first division in order to get promotion into the Premier League

After beating Fulham 2-1 in the first game of the season.

Then Wigan beats them 5-0.

His crowning glory… a 2-1 win over Arsenal.

Followed by a 1-0 win over Tottenham and West Ham and suddenly Hull City are the toast of London Town.

Then Chelsea hand them a 3-0 beat down, followed by a 4-3 loss to United and things aren’t so rosy again.

… followed by a string of losses and draws to a mix of teams. The fall is on.

Then, a stroke of geenious, he sits his players down, in front of the crowd and proceeds to give them a lecture. On boxing day.

They lose this game 5-1.

Not much fun happens until the bust up with old Joe Kinnear, where both managers are sent off.

They lose

They lose

it rains

They lose…

Wenger shakes his hand… again.

Then, Cesc invades the pitch mid-game, kicks in three illegal goals, wearing an Al Queda “bomber” jacket, while spitting on Phil Brown’s dessicated corpse. The world is outraged. Arsenal are banned from playing football for 10 years.

Hull are crushed and go on a loser’s streak

And now, here we come to the last two games of the season and even two wins (against Bolton and United) might not save them from relegation.

Arsenal still might have a say in this as well, if they can eek out a win against Man U this Saturday it will force  Man U to rape the dessicated corpse of Phil Brown in order to win the title on the last day of the season.

That would almost certainly see them relegated.

(Updated to make more sense and remove one extra picture, who knew that preview was my friend?)

I’m off

The panel van is all packed and we’re just about ready to leave but I thought I’d stop by for a quick note because there was a pretty major announcement yesterday.

But first, let me say, Arseblog wrote a piece this morning that basically said it’s the manager’s job to “bring success” (code for trophies) to the club and that this “success” will only happen when we buy some “experienced” (code for old) player.

He’s wrong.

Well, sort of.  Success can be defined in many ways: for Derby last season success was achieved when they scored a goal.  For Arsenal, this year and every year for the next 10, success is not going into bankruptcy or (worse) being forced into a takeover by Alisher Usmanov.  Every single thing that the board and the management says and does indicates that they are running Arsenal like a business and will be very, very conservative when it comes to transfers in.  And so, I think we need to redefine success for ourselves away from the notion that Arsenal are perennial title/FA cup challengers and toward the notion that Arsenal are a frugal team and title challenges are icing on the cake.

Success could also be seen as being a member of a club that bucks the current system.  Arsenal don’t need to pay £80m every year to bring in big names like Kaka and Schevchenko and then slip up at the last minute of the final; we can do that on the cheap!

And further, why does everyone think Arsenal need experienced players?  Who’s more experienced than Fabregas, Toure, Clichy, Eboue, Almunia, Senderos, and van Persie?  They’ve all been to the Champions League final and have had years of experience in the EPL.  Throw in old man Gallas for some salt and a poor haircut and I honestly struggle to see what more experience the team needs.

So a shift in definitions, really a shift in perspective is needed. This team has the necessary components to win a title.  Unless… unless Cesc Fabregas gets injured.  But it looks like it would cost £80m to get a replacement for him anyway and I don’t see that happening.

Speaking of which, the Kaka to Chelsea for £80m story does add a bit of a wrinkle to the Adebayor to AC Milan story.  If Milan were to suddenly find themselves flush with £80m would they reconsider a bid for Adebayor at £25m+?  Maybe, but all signs right now are pointing toward Adebayor being in an Arsenal strip next season.

Which is another thing you should probably shift your perspective on.

Anyway, that’s it for today.  8 hours of driving HERE I COME.

I'm off

The panel van is all packed and we’re just about ready to leave but I thought I’d stop by for a quick note because there was a pretty major announcement yesterday.

But first, let me say, Arseblog wrote a piece this morning that basically said it’s the manager’s job to “bring success” (code for trophies) to the club and that this “success” will only happen when we buy some “experienced” (code for old) player.

He’s wrong.

Well, sort of.  Success can be defined in many ways: for Derby last season success was achieved when they scored a goal.  For Arsenal, this year and every year for the next 10, success is not going into bankruptcy or (worse) being forced into a takeover by Alisher Usmanov.  Every single thing that the board and the management says and does indicates that they are running Arsenal like a business and will be very, very conservative when it comes to transfers in.  And so, I think we need to redefine success for ourselves away from the notion that Arsenal are perennial title/FA cup challengers and toward the notion that Arsenal are a frugal team and title challenges are icing on the cake.

Success could also be seen as being a member of a club that bucks the current system.  Arsenal don’t need to pay £80m every year to bring in big names like Kaka and Schevchenko and then slip up at the last minute of the final; we can do that on the cheap!

And further, why does everyone think Arsenal need experienced players?  Who’s more experienced than Fabregas, Toure, Clichy, Eboue, Almunia, Senderos, and van Persie?  They’ve all been to the Champions League final and have had years of experience in the EPL.  Throw in old man Gallas for some salt and a poor haircut and I honestly struggle to see what more experience the team needs.

So a shift in definitions, really a shift in perspective is needed. This team has the necessary components to win a title.  Unless… unless Cesc Fabregas gets injured.  But it looks like it would cost £80m to get a replacement for him anyway and I don’t see that happening.

Speaking of which, the Kaka to Chelsea for £80m story does add a bit of a wrinkle to the Adebayor to AC Milan story.  If Milan were to suddenly find themselves flush with £80m would they reconsider a bid for Adebayor at £25m+?  Maybe, but all signs right now are pointing toward Adebayor being in an Arsenal strip next season.

Which is another thing you should probably shift your perspective on.

Anyway, that’s it for today.  8 hours of driving HERE I COME.